Drinking from a Firehose

I don't like hackneyed expressions like 'drinking from a firehose,'  but I can't stop saying it to myself.  It is how I feel.   On Monday I will have a port inserted in my chest:literally a mainline that will go straight into an artery in my chest, leaving two small chords falling on the outside of my chest: this is where they put the medicine in so that it can get into my bloodstream quickly.  It looks like I am wearing a strange modern art like medal on my chest.   

The stem cell harvest will be on Tuesday,  Wednesday and Thursday of next week.  A port will be in for the duration of my transplant as well; it allows doctors to have quick access to my blood. 

My phone rings constantly with calls from my doctor's office explaining different aspects of my stem cell harvest.  There is a separate professional for each of my needs;  they are polite, experienced, kind, patient and helpful.  As I was typing, a Patient to Patient support specialist called to match me with someone who has had a transplant and can answer some of my questions from a patient's perspective.  Needless to say, I have many questions and am very grateful for the calls. 

In preparation for the stem cell harvest I have been advised to consume extra calcium because the blood thinner that will be given to me during the stem cell harvest process will take some calcium from my blood.   Below I have listed a timetable of what happens before and during the stem cell harvest process.  

P = Port/catheter placement day

SCH = Stem cell harvest day 1

STEM CELL HARVEST PROCESS

P -3 = inject 2 x 300 mg syringes of Neupogen as instructed by doctor; eat high calcium diet; take an antihistamine which will help with bone pain related to stem cell harvest; get COVID test and send results to your Doctor

P-2 = inject 2 x 300 mg syringes of Neupogen as instructed by doctor best in early am; eat high calcium diet; take an antihistamine

P-1 =  inject 2 x 300 mg syringes of Neupogen as instructed by doctor best in early am; eat high calcium diet; take an antihistamine; stop eating at midnight

P = inject 2 x 300 mg syringes of Neupogen as instructed by doctor at least 2 hours before port placement appointment; bring high calcium food for after you wake up from procedure;  take an antihistamine first thing in the am; do not eat or drink anything until after procedure; take zofran after procedure

- Get Mozobil injection at the end of the day (this encourages stem cells out of bone marrow as Neupogen does)  DONT FORGET TO TAKE ZOFRAN BEFORE THE SHOT to prevent nausea. 

SCH = inject 2 x 300 mg syringes of Neupogen as instructed by doctor at least 2 hours before SCH appointment; bring high calcium food for after procedure;  take an antihistamine first thing in the am; take zofran 30 minutes before Mozobil injection 

- Get Mozobil injection at the end of the day 

The SCH procedure will be repeated for 2-3 days until my doctor gets enough cells to make the transplant successful.  The protocol that I've listed above will be repeated each day until enough stem cells are collected. 

A note to spouses/partners

You have figured out by now that being a cancer partner is a huge job.  Remember that one way or another it will not go on forever, but your job is the most important one.  A loved and supported spouse has the best chance of winning the fight against cancer.  To be a spouse that helps a cancer patient, you must summon qualities of dependability, organization, warmth, care, love, humor and selfless. There will be temporary sacrifices.  Once again, this will not go on forever.  

If you feel that you are not up to the task as a caregiver, which will involve temporary personal sacrifice, either get help to change that or bring someone into your spouse's life who will be able to provide the constancy and dedication he or she needs.  There is a LOT of detail that goes on in this phase and once again, your sick spouse needs extra love, warmth, kindness and reassurance at this time and through the transplant process.  If you cannot provide it, find someone who can. 

Full disclosure: I am going through a divorce that began shortly after my diagnosis.  It makes me very sad.  Maybe this is why I had trouble keeping my cancer a secret.  I need love and support from the universe right now.   I sometimes feel sad when I am at my cancer hospital and I see older couples going through this process together.    His mother hopes that I die next year so that he will not have to pay me.  It is as unbelievable to write this as it is for you to read it.  She screamed (screamed loudly) "You would be CRAZY to pay her when she might pass away next year.  CRAZY!!!"  I heard her say this when he pocket dialed me by accident and didn't realize it.  Unbelievable but true.  She hopes that I die so that he won't have to pay me.  His tactic: let the divorce process go on as long as possible with the hope that I die before settlement.   We learn great things from our parents. 

I have a group of extraordinary friends and family that have filled in the gaps in this process (as it is truly a lot of work, time and handholding).  They have taken care of all of the details in my life, many of which I have not even thought of myself.  I feel stronger because they are in my life. 

If you are dedicated to helping your  partner through this process, you can help best at this time by: 
- keeping your spouse's calendar: remind them of times of injections, fasting, zofran, appointments, etc. 
- cook or buy healthy dinners for them to eat
- keep the stress level in your lives as low as possible
- buy enough calcium rich foods for a week and remember to bring food to the Port placement and stem cell harvest appointments 
- remind your spouse that together you will beat this cancer
- plan to be there during the stem cell harvest days; they will start at 8 am and finish by 515
- keep your own sense of balance and find strength somehow.  It is a taxing and exhausting process for you, too. 

Please write or comment with questions.  Sending wishes of peace and good health to all.  

In case I missed anything: 

https://www.mskcc.org/cancer-care/patient-education/autologous-peripheral-blood-stem-cell-harvesting

one for caregivers 

https://www.mskcc.org/cancer-care/patient-education/autologous-peripheral-blood-stem-cell-harvesting

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